Genting here i come!!!

Hi peeps and light. My performance was sucky.Well, i don't wish to talk about except i cant wait to give a better performance for the president. As for vaish, i am not a compulsive alcoholic and i wont become one.Hahaha, thanks for your concerns though. I will be fine.

Well, I'm heading to genting for the next 5 days. For business cum holiday. Though, i have fallen ill. Sobs. Hopefully i will get better before i reach genting. I decided to record my whole journey for you peeps, to enjoy the sights and sounds with me. A video diary specially added for this already pathetic blog. Figured that God, has given my sister and myself this great opportunity to understand my mother better.As a person. My whole of 18 years, i have not understood my mother. Never felt love from her. And i want to know her inner self, her passions and basically her whole life. I want to be able to finally tell her that I am sorry for all the troubles that i have given her. And i want to show her that i truly love her and never meant to hurt her. As the eldest after my adopted brother, i want to make it up to her. Truly. Can' t Wait. Officially, nervousness has just kicked in.

I have done alot of thinking these days. And i have decided to give myself a chance to make my love relationship work. Although, i will always keep my distance from commitment. Not like as if i have a choice of freedom like the rest of you love birds out there have. Without doubt, under my priorities, love is in the last section of my life. Many of my friends, like Meena,May and a few others have mentioned a couple of times, you are matured in your mind, though for your age. I am only 18 by the way. LOL. Oh come on, matured in mind? Piss, yeah right!!Haha, ask my sister how childish i still am. I guess i have to admit i am kinda matured in mind. Maybe it's because of the responsibilities i have at this age. More than what an ordinary middle class girl could have. Again, everyone has problems. We just need have to have that little faith and hope in our hearts to break those barriers in front of us.

Well. don't get me wrong.Not like as if i have completely lost my old self. I still don't believe in love..haha, my friends are definitely pist by me whenever i say this. I guess of the inspeakable Bus incident and other incidents that i have witnessed have led me to a conclusion that men are disgusting and have the most dirtiest mind. SHUT UP LEASHA!! Told yeah peeps and light, i still haven't changed a bit. Damn this blog has definitely messed up my mind. Words have become an influential tool to changing or creating a definite mind confusion.

Right now i am watching PS.I love you my favourite scene, the one where both the characters meets each other for the first time, in Ireland. Well, these beautiful scenes only happens with proper guidance from award winning authors and director's beautiful selection of shots. And lots of lighting and fans to create the mood of wind and sunshine. Great dialogues. Beautiful musical score. Amazing editing. Of course, they never forget the perfect casting. What more can i ask, Gerard and Hilary.

I am now wondering, is there such replica scenes in real life too? Well, as for my boyfriend, how did we met? Well, lets see, in acting class. He staring at me, and me fiddling with a phone. And i definitely remember bumping into him when we did our characterisation around the studio. "Sorry" we said to each other.That's it. I don't remember hearing music. With my eyebrow raised in doubt. Yup, im perfectly sure i didn't hear music. Except i thought "he is cute."

By the way, I seriously feel that right now our relationship stands at a 4/10 scale. Due to his school work and everything.I don't blame him. He has to remember the bet. Oh gosh..what have i done. I just realize something and i am definitely not saying.

Anyways, my phlegm is irritating me. My nose is whistling away.My throat is itchy and i can feel like I'm going to be down with a fever. Perfect chance, for me to purposely stop writing this blog and sleep. Got to go. Hopefully There is an Internet cafe at Genting, so as to update on to this blog, k light and peeps. NItes.

PS I hope these 4-5 days will be great, filled with happiness and one the most memorable chapters in my life. I don't know what it is, but i have this feeling that i am definitely going to experience a hefty. Blame intuition. I don't know. I don't wish to expect anything, otherwise i will feel regretted.