use me....throw me..

LIght

i have learned that God have shown me people that are using me to gain their prospects and money. Using my talent and hardwork, research and tools to their benefit.

In the end, i turn into a ugly topic to talk about.

While things all go fine?

Life till now....

Dear light,

life has been going up and down in this span of one year. I am now a Producer and actor.

As for my career, Kavitah is nice enough to see my potential and trusted in giving me a job as a Producer of her project last year, "Uthavikku varalaama?" which production commenced 3 days after my birthday 21st september 2009- 10th january. Nagharaj was the Director, writer and host of the programme.

I got a supporting role in a movie, the first tamil local film produced by T.T Dhavamani, Blue river productions. Right after the drama "Vaarthai" a 50 episode programme I have agreed for a 44 episode programme produced by Spectra productions for a comedy drama telecasting on vasantham on the april 8th.

I hope everything would go well light. I am nervous for the future and things have definitely changed in my life.

Anyways, i miss reading novels. However, i know that i would not have much time after starting the drama on the first week of march.

As for career wise, i have planned out my time from june 2010 to april 2011. I am not giving up on my script. I do have plans. Firstly, i have to be stable financially then everything else.

So planning to go into a different venture. Hopefully it will work out. Wish me luck light and peeps.

I am already exhausted. Will update you soon. Good nite.

The 26th.

Hey light,

It has been many months and weeks since i have updated as usual. So me! Just to reaccount my 26th June 2009, it was a tough day for me. Firstly, I woke up feeling much different than usual. Head down for shoot exhausted after my previous day's shoot till 4am in the morning. My co-actor Deva told me "Did you hear the news? Micheal Jackson is dead." I was flabbergasted. I just couldnt believe what i have heard. I called my best friend and it was confirmed that the news is true.



As i deliver my dialouges as Divya for the drama Vaathai, I recalled the days of me listening to the King of Pop's music and imitaing his moves with my siblings. He was a legend and was a great part in my younger days. Hearing that my star is dead is just simply devastating and a great lost to the music industry. He was the catalyst for the change in the music industry. Be it sleek and sharp moves he has definitely made his fans go gaga over him.



I did sit in a corner when my shot wasnt ready, still trying to digest the truth.

Later in the afternoon, I had a phone call from my mom. My aunt was in pain and unconscious. The ambulance was downstairs and the paramedics were at my house.

I immediately told the producer, i had to head down to the Singapore general hospital. After many gruelly hours of waiting at the A& E ward. She had one of her disk in her neck collapsed and creating tension to her muscles and her nervous.


I have been working hard every since i came out of tantra television. I barely had time to rest. The same week i accepted the offer to act in the 50 episode drama in Vasantham produced by Spectra Production By Mr Anba Aran.



I am very sure in what i am doing. I am working towards my career definitely.

I have learned.

Hi Light,

Hi peeps and light. I have just begun to understand the hardships and have faced failures in the beginning of my career.Though, I have worked hard for Uncle taxi engae pogudhu, i decided to leave at episode 18. I just couldn't get along with Vishnu. Not that he is demanding, he is just plain egoistic. I moved out of UTEP and joined Nagharaj in Iyantra. I guess i had a fair share of learning what is producing in a hard way in UTEP. I am glad to have stepped in two different genres and learned the best and worst from both. I guess i was much more at ease and happy though cranky most of the time due to the tight schedules in Iyantra, with the help of Nagharaj and Koki i could still survive.

I am now acting full time in a drama with Spectra Productions. This time I am learning and getting myself trained in a hard way itself on learning chunky long dialogues in just 5 mins and delivering it in 4 takes. I am learning. I guess that It is time for me to trained myself. I sometimes feel that I should get myself embarrassed to be able to do good.

Anyways, I have not been feeling well. I am going to take an early sleep

THE MEDIA AND MUAH

Hi light and peeps. I have unfortunately lost 9 kilos and have become an extremely unhealthy individual as told by a BMI machine and a personal trainer that I interviewed for my hosting programme, Illamai Connections airing on the 24th Oct 2008. My hard work and baby, Uncle taxi engae Pogudhu is airing on television on the 21st Oct 2008. And I am acting in a telemovie airing on Deepavali in the afternoon.So do check me out.

I seriously hope that My career will go extremely well. I feel glad yet exhausted yet excitied....Alot of mixed emotions good and bad.

I Hope you readers would keep me posted with your much exciting lives. Thank you for supporting me this far. And this is not and never will be the end of my life and breath for career.Acting my passion, my breath my everything.God bless everyone.

Where is Leasha?

Hi my lovable light and peeps. These past few weeks have made me go nuts.And have turned me into a zombie.I am crying while i am typing this post.Yes, i know what you are thinking? Where has Leasha Gone? You must be assuming that that i am doing really great mentally, after all i took more than 2 months of anti-social deprivation. It worked perfectly until others stepped into my life and tried to destroy it again. I suppose its a gift from god, to test my patience!!! Hell no!!! Swesh...my beautiful and peaceful yet doubtful life was doing great. ......I remember drinking hot chocolate at exactly 5pm, standing confidently at the 859 bus lane and talking to my good friend May, at how wonderful life has become. Until, Jason came in. And there goes ,my peace. WEEEEE.....down the drain.

I seriously have lost myself. I want Leasha back, so badly. Not some zombie staring at the computer typing this and grieving over the fact of saying yes all the time. Maybe it must be that book May lend me. The manipulative "The year of yes"!!! it must be!! I am so going to finish up that book first. I mean how dirty men can be? Not that i have not seen enough.I already experienced one.


Love and relationships has the power to alter and define our lives.How true is it? But is it because, we let it alter us? Who controls who? Why do people obsess over it? While I constantly try to avoid it, yet it comes all the way back again. By the way, my visions came true again. Changi!! If only i could understand my visions even before they happen. Conclusion, I never will believe in love and my respect for most of guys have diminished!! I am wiping off the tears off my cheeks.sIGH.Off to study my final theory.


PS i want leasha back.The one that constantly thinks about so many other better things. I so desperately need siva to give me that job From tantra ink. I need a diversion.NOW!!I really desperately need it!!!Please!!

I need to let go

Hey light and peeps. It's been a while for me since i updated.Although it seems to be a decade. Alot of in speakable things has happened over this week that i don't wish to share. Anyways, i am still in my greatest book escapism adventure. As i am reading each of the book, I am trying to relate every single book back to my life. As i flip each of the page, the smell of lavender on certain pages ,while others the patches of spilled coffee. I wonder who the previous reader was? And why this book? As i am reading a specific paragraph, did you my previous reader cry just like how i did? What made you want to read it? Just a liking,a hobby or maybe shares a certain familiarity with me, an insane idea of switch.Do the writer and i share the same thoughts or am i manipulated to think the same way as you do, my wonderful saviour?

You know i am absolutely grateful and have no regrets of choosing this adventure. Because i actually relate my life to it.And i realised that it's just the beginning of a change. I am lost in this trail of books.

About my exercise regim, i have lost 5kg from my previous weight of 45kg. However, i have learned to eat right and understand that by skipping meals it will never be healthy for me.

I am back to reading.Catch up with you soon.

BTW, A SPECIAL SHOUTOUT TO MY GOOD FRIEND WITH THE UNFORGETTABLE LAUGHTER , JANICE (13TH MAY) !!!HAPPY BIRTHDAY DOUGHNUT !! A SMACKDOWN ADVANCE GREETING TO ANOTHER GOOD FRIEND OF MINE, THE ONE WITH THE ALL SO MIXED UP YET NICELY WORN , MAY( 25th MAY). HAPPY BIRTHDAY WHIPPED CREAM!!!

Missed you girls. I can't wait to meet up with you and have a blast at our favourite hangout, The Mind's Cafe. Ok, alright we're not going to have those candles and will definitely keep in mind not to burn down the cafe. Although, i secretly hope to see the china guy again. I wonder what will be his reaction when he hears that we are having another birthday celebration.YIKES, THEY'RE BACK.RUN!!! I am sure as we girls step into the cafe, if the boss remembers, they might panic. I wonder do they have a warning alarm zone just to remind them of our existence? Maybe some anxiety attacks.Just like how any mother will feel,the fear, whenever she leaves her child alone in her room.The fear of repetition: the child giggling and jumping up and down in joy as he/she scribbles gibberish on the mother's painted wall with her lipstick.NO!!! The Cafe boss, i bestow you Mr Grumpy, must have nicknamed us as the destroyers or the bloodsucking group? or have they banned celebrations right after our fiesco...haha..I wonder. Missed Annie though. i wonder what might she be doing in Vietnam right now.